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Kingdom of Mind

by Within our Gates

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1.
Conception 06:55
An Impact, a force so fierce it shakes the earth. Beginning tremors; this is conception. The shock leaves him faint, Surrounded by ruin, fire, and destruction. This man lies naked and alone in a crater that he seems to have created. He comes to, looks at his new surroundings as if he was just conceived. “Here I am, standing alone at the threshold of the world. These colors so vivid, no longer the cynic, I’m the prophecy foretold.” This pit, for ever so brief, is called home. But is only within arm’s length, for beyond what he can see is unknown. A dark cloud with a silver lining gazed into his heart and spoke, He climbs to the ledge of his abyss with anticipation. Step by step scaling the wall, he rises to see the plain of his existence. A dark cloud with a silver lining gazed into his heart and spoke I see its symmetry that is unparalleled. Like a child’s first sight of heaven, Like a man’s first sight of hell. “Here I am, standing alone at the threshold of the world. These colors so vivid, no longer the cynic, I’m the prophecy foretold.” A prophecy that’s instantly incomprehensible, A fight to see, that seems to be impossible. “Here I am, standing alone at the threshold of the world. These colors so vivid, no longer for the cynic, I’m the prophecy foretold.”
2.
Bring me all that I need to truly be. At peace, I am one man, one mind to believe that I am the reason I live and I am the preservation of self. Feeding the flames of my deepest desires. Awake in a dream, a blissful eternity. The sun has set upon my every word and action, yet content, I live, I love the end will state that I am, the reason I live and I am the preservation of self. Feeding the flames of my deepest desires. Awake in a dream, a blissful eternity. This stress is not an option, selfishness has taken over. He embraces the intoxication. The allure has left him blind to the quest one must endure. Unknown he is bound to the demon that will procure. Hatred toward all those whom which we want to love.
3.
A quarrel ensues, a man against his mind. You can’t look away from your destiny. You will fulfill. You will conquer, even if you are a selfish piece of shit. Please try, to rise, to your expectations. I’ll decide on my, final resolution. Before I’m dead in the Earth. I’ve lost all faith in happiness, You are the reason spite exist. Falling down from the sky, I hold this pride no more. Fighting to turn this tide that’s crashing upon the shore. Away from your self-righteousness, learning from my nothingness. Tearing me from propriety, leave me to my life I lead. Actions do have consequence, burning me with all your sins. Refusal lies in ignorance, expectations of nothing less. You’ve lost all faith in happiness. You are the reason spite exists. Falling down from the sky, I hold this pride no more Fighting to turn this tide that’s crashing upon the shore. A silhouette set ablaze. Arose from the ashes, I looked to him and screamed. I’ve seen your worth, but now you’re a worthless piece of shit. My mind is the demon. I am the reason for the prevision of this land. Falling down from the sky, I hold this pride no more. Fighting to turn this tide that’s crashing upon the shore.
4.
Sever the bond, so I am one! My trust has fallen short of what you’ve made. Invaded my mind to rot this world that’s mine. Betrayal has consumed your every word, as my malice rains, your sky is falling down. Deception has absorbed everything, as my malice rains. I prey on your soul. Hate seeps through my pores. I know what is mine. I trust you no more! Consumed by my malice, your life is the only one to save. So dig your fucking grave. Breath malevolence and spite. Negate good will. I’m trying to cut the noose, but it’s always tied to you. You’ll drop while the rope is loose, with just your neck to break the fall. Betrayal has consumed your every word. As my malice rains, your sky is falling down. My hatred rips through every nerve. Twist the knife and drain your blood upon the ground. You’ve reached the point of no return. I am your executioner. I’m trying to cut this noose, but it’s always tied to you. You’ll drop while the rope is loose, with just your neck to break the fall. The link has shattered.
5.
Terror rushes through my veins. Fear is the spawn of my hatred. Horror is a vicious laceration, that’s bleeding the violence of my own creation. We have come for your world, built on lust, seduction, bringing death and destruction to all. It’s an insidious rite of passage to devour the survivors and stack the dead in the masses. Uncompromising thoughts of ill restraint that bring me hatred. Unrestricted thoughts of death that carry me to the gates of hell. My spite will cast you to the lightless corners, and leave you with suffering. Terror rushes through my veins, fear is the spawn of my hatred. Horror is a vicious laceration, that’s bleeding the violence of my own creation. We have come for your world, built on lust, seduction, bringing death and destruction to all. It’s an insidious rite of passage to devour the survivors and stack the dead. You fight as if I am tangible, mocking you to frustration that wears you down. A child’s play, a infants crawl. This world is mine to burn. This man is mine to burn. Crushed and beaten, exiled forever. You will be mine. Your fear brings me life. Horror is a vicious laceration, that is bleeding the violence of my own creation. We have come for your world, built on lust, seduction, bringing death and destruction to all. It’s an insidious right of passage to devour the survivors and stack the dead of the masses
6.
Dolor 08:17
Defeated and left in desolation, I am overwhelmed. Traveling through this darkness, feeling memories that were once had. By me or by another? Alone in this place, I’ve become one with these thoughts. Visions of evil, visions of hatred, visions of corruption which has not been felt in this world. Walking in a possession. Existence is my question. What is this life? Where is this life? Overcoming, this is who I am. I turned from a saint into a sinner. Overcoming, this who I’ve become. I am the transgression of a prodigy. The ashes of my thoughts surrounding me. I have brought myself into the fire. The wake astounds me, I stagger onto the ground. Bombarding my mind, these recollections compiling to orchestrate my variance. My past is overpowering my soul, deepening the depression of my life as a whole. Trying to assemble the puzzle of his past. Recollect the life once had. The ashes of my thoughts surrounding me. I have brought myself into the fire. The wake astounds me, I stagger onto the ground. I’m a fucking disgrace. On the brink of surrender, he lays down to sulk.
7.
Get up! This man should be left to rot. Taking comfort in self pity. But I know this is not it. My past will be slain, I will capture the life that is intended to be. He stands in determination, collects all his strength for the encounter. I see my life is slipping away, I don’t know where to turn. And all my thoughts are running astray. I’m seeking sanity. Cause deep in thought my mind will fall. For all that’s left in me, there’s nothing left at all. There’s nothing left but your fall. I’ll embrace the violence for retaliation. My world will be at peace when I rid of your company. Face to face, you won’t have a chance to speak. Controlled me for far too long, fear has since left. Reformed by building your cell. Fuck you and enjoy hell. I see my life is slipping away, I don’t know where to turn, and all my thoughts are running astray, I’m seeking sanity. Cause deep in thought my mind will fall, for all that’s left in me, there’s nothing left at all. There’s nothing left, but your fall. I’ll embrace the violence for retaliation. My world will be at peace. Reformed by building your cell. Fuck you and enjoy hell. Tear out my heart to show you my scars. I’ll rip out your heart to vanquish your farce. I’ve overcome destruction to master creation. I’d die a thousand times to see what is true. And after all these things I’ve been through, it turned out better than I hoped for, prayed for, lived for.
8.
Feels like I’m ready to implode from all the fears and lies I’ve known. See my conscience shatter like glass, bringing you to your collapse. And I’m getting stronger every step I take. Skipping through every scene, couldn’t tell if you were friend or fiend. There’s wellness for tomorrow from the fight against my sorrow. To whom this is addressed, to whom this may concern: Your reign of discontent will finally burn. To admit is to confess, to forgive is not to forget. Stained in my memory, wisdom gained in misery. Let the rain wash down and cleanse my soul, I’ve puzzled the pieces to make me whole. My mind is a dreamscape that one day now will seal my fate. Torn between my past and present, looking for my rightful return. I’m getting stronger along the way. I won’t be held down, trapped in this world so divine. I’ll let it burn. I won’t be held down. Let the rain wash down and cleanse my soul. I’ve puzzled the pieces to make me whole. My mind is a dreamscape that one day now will seal my fate. My mind be right, my soul have sight to finally see with clarity. I’ve overcome my sorrow. Lost all control. Counting down the day till life starts over again. Capture my soul. Counting down the day till life starts over again.
9.
My mental mortar is cracked. Degraded, weakened to black. I alone will undertake, because alone I destroyed, to reconstruct and to replace the void. It’s structures have collapsed, without I will not get back. With change as my nails, and wisdom as my stone, I will rebuild a city that represents my integrity. I will restart and renew. I will patch the holes that I’ve torn in this existence. An architect in my own right, my metropolis will be one of harmony where negativity will neither be seen nor created. Comes from the heart that brings me life. Deep in the thoughts that left me behind. Work will not cease, this will be complete. For until perfection I cannot return. To manufacture my serenity is through labor, strife, and sweat. To fabricate tranquility I am closer to subduing debt. An architect in my own right, my metropolis will be one of harmony. Comes from the heart that brings me life. Deep in the thoughts that left me behind. The steel of my conscience will become towers and monuments. I’ve spackled the walls to make them seamless for the righteous, for the shameless. Comes from the heart that brings me life. Deep in the thoughts that left me behind. I will not rest till my life is whole.
10.
The world is created from my mind and there is only pain outside. I will choose this as my home, even if I am left alone. Like a king to his throne, I have made this my own. Like skin to the bone, separation will be unknown. Like a master to the slave, shackled and bound on the plain. Flaws of one are flaws of all. One sin and the kingdom will fall. Specifications met in tact, fantasies transformed to fact, the ideal place for me. Is my time running short? For outward is nothing to live for. Like a king to his throne, I have made this my own. Like skin to the bone, separation will be unknown. Like a master to the slave, Shackled and bound on the plain. Flaws of one are flaws of all, one sin and the kingdom will fall. Infatuated with what was earned. Captivated by the aurora of how I turned this depredation into solace. Ascendancy to my highest plateau. Now the years come and go, and my reign holds true. Months pass like days. Thy kingdom come. The beauty has dissipated, heft returned to weightless mass. It’s lush terrain now barren soil, I want to leave at last. All the flowers color seemed to fade. The greens of the grass and the blue of the sky lost their luster and elegance. I’ve pressed decades under thumb, thought my time had just begun. I may have made decisions wrong. Like a king to his throne, I have made this my own. Like skin to the bone, separation will be unknown. Like a master to the slave, shackled and bound on the plain. Flaws of one are flaws of all, one sin and the kingdom will fall.

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released November 18, 2012

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Within our Gates Harrisonburg, Virginia

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